Guided By Voices - Ogre’s Trumpet (Guided By Voices, 2018)

Guided By Voices
Ogre’s Trumpet
Guided By Voices Inc
2018

Rating: 7 bulletproof federales out of 10

As someone who has seen Guided By Voices many times, I can definitively say that “Ogre’s Trumpet” does a pretty damn good job of giving you a small glimpse into what seeing them perform live is all about.  At a little over an hour it’s way shorter than one of their shows…when I saw them a few months ago I left after two and a half hours, and the band was still going (I think their set list that night was in the neighborhood of 60 songs if not more).  The one big feature lacking here: the recording is very clean, likely straight from the soundboard with additional mastering, and you miss out on all the crowd singing/participation - something that would be annoying with almost every other band, but with GBV it almost works like an extra band member.  The track list is about one-third classics and two-thirds post-reunion tracks, which is a fair mirror to what you get in person - of course everyone always want more of the OG songs, but it’s not a bad ratio given the sheer size of the band’s song catalogue.     

Guided By Voices - Males Of Wormwood Mars 7'' (Guided By Voices Inc., 2014)

Guided By Voices
Males Of Wormwood Mars 7''
Guided By Voices Inc.
2014

Rating: 7 partial airedales out of 10

As always it's next to impossible to keep up with the release schedule of Guided by Voices, but this seven inch caught my ear.  Both the title track and the b-side "A Year That Could Have Been Worse" sound like vintage GBV with plenty of hooks and a lo-fi crunch to the sound.  In fact the b-side sounds so, well, wonky, that it sounds like one of their very early songs.  I'm digging it.  The actual vinyl is sold out so you'll have to let the internet fix things for you here like I did.

Guided By Voices - Plantations of Pale Pink 7'' (Matador, 1996)

Guided By Voices
Plantations of Pale Pink 7''
Matador
1996

Rating: 8 right wing conspiracies out of 10

This is from the golden era of GBV and my nostalgia forces me to love it, but it's not the band's strongest work from that era.  Six songs, three on each side, and not really a star in the bunch but no stinkers either.  Typical Pollard pop from start to finish.  I don't really have anything else to say about this. 

Cobra Verde / Lotion - Split 7'' (Simple Solution, 1997)

Cobra Verde / Lotion
Split 7''
Simple Solution
1997

Rating: 6.5 false impressions out of 10

Two Guided by Voices covers by two different bands.  Cobra Verde handles one of my favorites, "Striped White Jets," in a glammy, skeezy rocked out way.  Their version sounds like a song a serial killer would dance around to, and I like it.  Some of Cobra Verde would actually go on to join GBV at some point.  The other track, "Quality of Armor," is by the band Lotion who I know nothing about, but their version of this great song is pretty decent...such a catchy track.   

Guided by Voices - Tigerbomb 7'' (Matador, 1995)

Guided by Voices
Tigerbomb 7''
Matador
1995

Rating: 10 neon lights out of 10

Six songs on one seven inch?  It's gotta be Guided by Voices.  Or maybe a hardcore band, except it's definitely GBV cause I'm listening to it right now.  Don't argue with me.  This includes different versions of two of GBV's greatest songs - "My Valuable Hunting Knife" and "Game of Pricks," plus four other truly great additional songs.  It's entirely possible these alternate versions are even better than the originals, big words coming from me.  Out of every seven inch I own, I've probably listened to this one the most. 

Robert Pollard - Honey Locust Honky Tonk (Guided By Voices Inc., 2013)

Robert Pollard
Honey Locust Honky Tonk
Guided By Voices Inc.
2013

Rating: Yep.

Robert Pollard released another record.  This one solo, as opposed to Guided by Voices or one of his many side projects.  I've lost count and I'm not even going to bother looking it up.  It's pretty good, more good than bad.  If you were to rank the 469 albums he's been a part of, this is probably in the upper quartile.  Definitely worth checking out. 

Guided By Voices - Flunky Minnows 7'' (Guided By Voices Inc., 2013)

Guided By Voices
Flunky Minnows 7''
Guided By Voices Inc. 
2013

Rating: 6.5 federal withholdings out of 10

The first single from the most recent record by Guided By Voices called "English Little League."  I listened to that full-length offering a week or two ago and was left feeling pretty ambivalent, but hearing the title track of this single "Flunky Minnows" in this setting as opposed to the album sounds much better for some reason.  Very catchy song.  The flip side, "Jellypop Smiles," is a pretty typical GBV lo-fi psychedelic jangler, nothing special really.  Title track is boss though.  Probably should give the full-length a second shot. 

Guided By Voices - English Little League (Guided By Voices Inc., 2013)

Guided By Voices
English Little League
Guided By Voices Inc. 
2013

Rating:  Elf Kickers out of Fast Japanese Spin Cycles

Another new record for Guided By Voices, their fourth I think with the reformed line-up.  It sounds exactly as your mind pictures it.  I cannot keep up.  Someone really really really needs to cull through all these latest releases and put out a "best of" because I don't have the time nor patience to devote.  Surely there are plenty of gems here - "Islands (She Talks In Rainbows)" is great at first listen, with Tobin Sprout singing and sounding like a Teenage Fanclub track.  Other good songs as well, but so much to wade through...

Guided by Voices - The Bears for Lunch (Guided by Voices Inc., 2012)

Guided by Voices
The Bears for Lunch
Guided by Voices Inc.
2012

Rating: Watch me bulldoze every bulldozer away.

Hey, another Guided by Voices record!  Imagine that!  Look, it sounds pretty good.  Some hooky songs, some filler, typical GBV.  It's like this - never heard of these guys?  Go buy "Alien Lanes,"it's one of the greatest records by any band of all time.  Then work your way up and/or out to their more recent work, but get completely dick deep in their nineties output.  As for longtime fans like myself...if you're keeping up with this recent resurgence, you might as well get this one too.  You won't be disappointed, but you probably won't be wowed either. 

Guided by Voices
Class Clown Spots a UFO
Guided by Voices Inc.
2012

Rating: Robert Pollard Robert Pollards out of Robert Pollard

I'm not even sure how you review a Guided by Voices record these days, or if there is even any point.  It's mostly the original line-up, there are a million songs on the record, and it sounds exactly like you expect a GBV record to sound - some pop gems, some generic tracks, and the occasional dud.  "Class Clown Spots a UFO" has nothing on the band's classic years, but it's not an embarrassment either.  The title track is great, "They and Them" reminds us why having Tobin Sprout in the band is important, "Starfire" holds orchestral pop beauty, and other songs will transport you back to 1995.  

While I might not get as excited for a new GBV album as I once did, it seems impossible to ever dislike what they do. 

Guided By Voices - Let's Go Eat the Factory (Guided By Voices Inc., 2012)

Guided By Voices

Let's Go Eat the Factory

Guided By Voices Inc. 

2012

Rating: 7 open wheel race cars out of 10

21 songs, a little over 40 minutes long...yep, this is a Guided By Voices album alright.  More importantly he got the old band back together, the "classic" line-up responsible for GBV's best work, and tried to recapture the magic.  Having seen this reunited line-up in tour they certainly still had the stage show down, and this newest recording seems headed in the right direction even if the songs aren't quite as strong as the material from "Alien Lanes" or "Bee Thousand."  It certainly feels like those old albums, lo-fi and sloppy, like the tracks were recorded after a long night of drinking and carousing at a local dive bar.  But it's that GBV type of sloppy, the endearing kind, like a child with disheveled hair or a cute drunk girl.  

At this point I can't imagine convincing someone to change their mind on this band based on their 843rd release.  An old fan?  You'll like this, it feels like a visit from a lost friend.  A new fan?  Just go buy "Alien Lanes", you can get to this later.  

Guided by Voices - Doughnut for a Snowman 7'' (Fire, 2011)

Guided by Voices

Doughnut for a Snowman 7''

Fire

2011

Rating: 6.5 oil drums out of 10

Five songs in just over six minutes - yep, it's a Guided by Voices seven inch all right!  Quick, catchy pop songs as you'd expect - a fairly clean sounding recording, though not hifi.  This was recorded with the "classic" line-up that recently reformed, went on tour, and recorded a new record to be released soon.  This is probably only a must-have for the die hard fans, but you could do much worse in life.  As an added bonus, there is more recorder being played on this than you'd usually get on a GBV release, for all you recorded fetishists out there. 

Robert Pollard - Lord of the Birdcage (Guided by Voices, 2011)

Robert Pollard

Lord of the Birdcage

Guided by Voices

2011

Rating: 7 ribbons of fat out of 10

Robert Pollard, Guided by Voices, releases a ton of albums, they all sound the same but are still awesome, see all my other Robert Pollard reviews, blah blah blah.  If you don't know what you're getting from this guy by now you've most likely been in a coma for 20 years.  Or you're really stupid. 

One thing of note with this record is the songs are all based around a grip of poems he wrote, so instead of writing songs then coming up with crazy lyrics for them, he wrote the crazy lyrics first and then wrote the songs around them.  Honestly, the results sound the same to me but everyone else seems to be mentioning it and I don't want to feel left out. 

Boston Spaceships - Let It Beard (Guided By Voices, 2011)

Boston Spaceships
Let It Beard
Guided By Voices
2011

Rating: 7 vicelord speed bumps out of 10

For those not aware, Boston Spaceships is a post-GBV Robert Pollard band. Even though GBV is still kinda around. And since Pollard is singing and writing the songs, it sounds like a GBV record. And it's not like they had the same line-up for the duration of the band, so I'm not sure why this other name was needed, but whatever...new Robert Pollard music. It's awesome if you like the stuff like I do. And it could be upwards of two months before he releases another album, so strike now while the iron is hot.

I guess it could be noted that Pollard collaborates with J Mascis and members of the Decemberists and Wire and the Dream Syndicate and more for this record, but it still sounds like a GBV record to me. I'm probably supposed to be more decerning as a "music critic", but fuck if I can tell a difference.

Robert Pollard - From a Compound Eye (Merge, 2006)

Robert Pollard
From a Compound Eye
Merge
2006

Rating: 7 mustard camels out of 10

 
Robert Pollard releasing a solo record isn’t generally that big of a deal - the man seems to be responsible in one way or another for about 30 records a year…even a diehard fan like myself can’t keep up.  But this is his first solo outing since officially disbanding Guided by Voices, so everyone is paying more attention and there is probably a bit more pressure to deliver.  Luckily for all of us, “From a Compound Eye” delivers like a classic GBV album - specifically, it reminds me a lot of a combination of “Vampire on Titus” and some of Pollard’s cleaner pop sensibilities that have developed during the band‘s last few releases.  The British Invasion-style hooks are all still there, as catchy as almost anything he has written - outside of the two albums of pure perfection, “alien Lanes” and “Bee Thousand” of course - those will never be topped.  Long-time fans will certainly be overjoyed with this record, and even those fans who only buy the occasional album by anything Pollard-related should make the effort to check this one out.

Guided By Voices - Human Amusements at Hourly Rates: The Best of Guided By Voices (Matador, 2003)

Guided By Voices
Human Amusements at Hourly Rates: The Best of Guided By Voices
Matador
2003

Rating: 8 minimum wage workers out of 10

This is a fantastic release not just for newcomers but even long time fans of Guided by Voices. This spans the entire GBV catalog and was compiled and sequenced by the man himself, Robert Pollard. For those not in the know, he is one of the most prolific songwriters of the last 15 years, and I’ve heard he’s written at least 5000 songs at this point in his career. Or as he said in an interview I once read, paraphrased – “I can write 5 songs while just sitting on the toilet and three of them will be good." Anyone who has never heard this great band would do themselves a favor of just buying this release – it hits on nearly all of their highlights (although you could never fit ALL of their best songs on just one disc). And most likely, after hearing this album you’ll want to go out and get the rest of their albums anyways ( I highly suggest "Bee Thousand" and "Alien Lanes", and if you can find them the "Fast Japanese Spin Cycle" and "Sunfish Holy Breakfast" EPs).